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Acceptance of Du’a ( suppliant)

November 29, 2012 By: Mohammad Rafique Etsame Category: Dimensions of belief

by Mohammad Rafique Etesame


Islam is a Deen of peace and tranquility. Its principles are simple and comprehensive and give guidance to human beings to the straight path. It is the deen that makes direct concern between man and God that whenever a needy person calls to Allah Almighty, He Replies at once and Helps him. The Holy Qu’an reveals:-

“And when My servants question thee unto Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer the suppliant when He crieth unto Me. So let them hear My call and let them trust in Me. In order they may be led aright. (Al-Baqarah:186)

This world is a trial-base for human being where he is trialed by various manners. He often has to face a painful state of affairs in his life that makes him confuse.

But he gets complete inner peace when he makes a call to Allah Almighty, Master of the world. Dua is a power full  source to solve the problems of the faithful believers. Because every works and action is done by Allah Subhanhu wa Ta’ala So, when a believer raises his hands for dua, he makes direct concern to Allah Almighty to solve his problems.

The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said that dua was the essence of worship. He also said that Allah became angry over the believer that did not make dua. We find an example of acceptance of a unique and strange Dua of a Messenger of Allha Hazrat Zachaaria(A.S) asking for a son in the old age as mentioned in the Holy Qur’an :-“ A mention of the mercy of thy Lord unto His servant Zachariah:- When he cried unto his Lord a cry in secret. Saying: My Lord! The bones of the wax feeble and my head is shinning with grey hair, and I have never blest in prayer to Thee, my Lord. Lo! I fear my kinsfolk after me, since my wife is barren. Oh, give me from Thy presence a successor Who shall inherit of me and inherit (Also) of the house of Jacob. And make him, my Lord, acceptable (unto Thee).

(It was said unto him): O Zachariah! Lo! We bring tiding of a son whose name is John We have given the same name to none before (him).

He said my Lord! How can I have a son when my wife is barren and I have reached infirm old age? He said: So (it will be) Thy Lord saith: it is easy to Me, even as I created thee before, when thou was naught.” (Mary:9) The question is: when a  man is almost seventy of eighty and his wife is barren, unable to deliver a child, then what is the hope to get a child?  But the Holy Quran makes it clear that Allah Subhanhu wa Ta’ala can do everything and there is nothing impossible for Him.

The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said that there were three Du’as that would be accepted surely and there was no doubt in it. First was the Du’a of parents for their children, that if the children served them and made them happy,then they wished good, it was accepted , and on the other hand if they made a painful behavior and teased them, and they cursed their children, then it was accepted inevitably.

In short, du;a is a powerful source of to get anything from Allah Almighy. So, ever faithful believer should make management for du’a.  May Allah Give us power to do so. Ameen.

How to make your wife happy?

November 26, 2012 By: Mohammad Rafique Etsame Category: Current Islamic Articles

The following is a summary of the book “How to make your wife happy by Sheikh Mohammed Abdelhaleem Hamed.

Beautiful Reception

After returning from work, school, travel, or whatever has separated you:

Begin with a good greeting.
Start with Assalamau ‘Aliaykum and a smile. Salam is a sunnah and a du’aa for her as well.
Shake her hand and leave bad news for later!

Sweet Speech and Enchanting Invitations

Choose words that are positive and avoid negative ones.
Give her your attention when you speak of she speaks.
Speak with clarity and repeat words if necessary until she understands.
Call her with the nice names that she likes, e.g. my sweet-heart, honey, saaliha, etc.

Friendliness and Recreation

Spend time talking together.
Spread to her goods news.
Remember your good memories together.

Games and Distractions

Joking around & having a sense of humor.
Playing and competing with each other in sports or whatever.
Taking her to watch permissible (halal) types of entertainment.
Avoiding prohibited (haram) things in your choices of entertainment.

Assistance in the Household

Doing what you as an individual can/like to do that helps out, especially if she is sick or tired.
The most important thing is making it obvious that he appreciates her hard work.

Consultation (Shurah)

Specifically in family matters.
Giving her the feeling that her opinion is important to you.
Studying her opinion carefully.
Be willing to change an opinion for hers if it is better.
Thanking her for helping him with her opinions.

Visiting Others

Choosing well raised people to build relations with. There is a great reward in visiting relatives and pious people. (Not in wasting time while visiting!)
Pay attention to ensure Islamic manners during visits.
Not forcing her to visit whom she does not feel comfortable with.

Conduct During Travel

Offer a warm farewell and good advice.
Ask her to pray for him.
Ask pious relatives and friends to take care of the family in your absence.
Give her enough money for what she might need.
Try to stay in touch with her whether by phone, e-mail, letters, etc..
Return as soon as possible.
Bring her a gift!
Avoid returning at an unexpected time or at night.
Take her with you if possible.

Financial Support

The husband needs to be generous within his financial capabilities. He should not be a miser with his money (nor wasteful).
He gets rewards for all what he spends on her sustenance even for a small piece of bread that he feeds her by his hand (hadeith).
He is strongly encouraged to give to her before she asks him.

Smelling Good and Physical Beautification

Following the Sunnah in removing hair from the groin and underarms.
Always being clean and neat.
Put on perfume for her.


It is obligatory to do it habitually if you have no excuse (sickness, etc.)
Start with “Bismillah” and the authentic du’a.
Enter into her in the proper place only (not the anus).
Begin with foreplay including words of love.
Continue until you have satisfied her desire.
Relax and joke around afterwards.
Avoid intercourse during the monthly period because it haram
Do what you can to avoid damaging her level of Hiyaa (shyness and modesty) such as taking your clothes together instead of asking her to do it first while he is looking on.
Avoid positions during intercourse that may harm her such as putting pressure on her chest and blocking her breath, especially if you are heavy.
Choose suitable times for intercourse and be considerate as sometimes she maybe sick or exhausted.

Guarding Privacy

Avoid disclosing private information such as bedroom secrets, her personal problems and other private matters.

Aiding in the Obedience to Allah

Wake her up in the last third of the night to pray “Qiyam-ul-Layl” (extra prayer done at night with long sujood and ruku’ua).
Teach her what you know of the Qur’an and its tafseer.
Teach her “Dhikr” (ways to remember Allah by the example of the prophet) in the morning and evening.
Encourage her to spend money for the sake of Allah such as in a charity sale.
Take her to Hajj and Umrah when you can afford to do so.

Showing Respect for her Family and Friends

Take her to visit her family and relatives, especially her parents.
Invite them to visit her and welcome them.
Give them presents on special occasions.
Help them when needed with money, effort, etc..
Keep good relations with her family after her death if she dies first. Also in this case the husband is encouraged to follow the sunnah and keep giving what she used to give in her life to her friends and family.

(Islamic) Training & Admonition

This includes:

The basics of Islam
Her duties and rights
Reading and writing
Encouraging her to attend lessons and halaqahs
Islamic rules (ahkam) related to women
Buying Islamic books and tapes for the home library

Admirable Jealousy

Ensure she is wearing proper hijab before leaving house.
Restrict free mixing with non-mahram men.
Avoiding excess jealousy.
Examples of this are:
1- Analyzing every word and sentence she says and overloading her speech by meanings that she did not mean
2- Preventing her from going out of the house when the reasons are just.
3- Preventing her from answering the phone.

Patience and Mildness

Problems are expected in every marriage so this is normal. What is wrong is excessive responses and magnifying problems until a marital breakdown.
Anger should be shown when she exceeds the boundaries of Allah SWT, by delaying prayers, backbiting, watching prohibited scenes on TV, etc..
Forgive the mistakes she does to you.

Correcting her Mistakes

First, implicit and explicit advice several times.
Then by turning your back to her in bed (displaying your feelings). Note that this does not include leaving the bedroom to another room, leaving the house to another place, or not talking with her.
The last solution is lightly hitting (when allowable) her. In this case, the husband should consider the following:

He should know that sunnah is to avoid beating as the Prophet PBUH never beat a woman or a servant.
He should do it only in extreme cases of disobedience, e.g. refusing intercourse without cause frequently, constantly not praying on time, leaving the house for long periods of time without permission nor refusing to tell him where she had been, etc..
It should not be done except after having turned from her bed and discussing the matter with her as mentioned in Qur’an .
He should not hit her hard injuring her, or hit her on her face or on sensitive parts of her body.
He should avoid shaming her such as by hitting her with a shoe, etc.

Pardoning and Appropriate Censure

Accounting her only for larger mistakes.
Forgive mistakes done to him but account her for mistakes done in Allah’s rights, e.g. delaying prayers, etc..
Remember all the good she does whenever she makes a mistake.
Remember that all humans err so try to find excuses for her such as maybe she is tired, sad, having her monthly cycle or that her commitment to Islam is growing.
Avoid attacking her for the bad cooking of the food as the Prophet PBUH never blamed any of his wives for this. If he likes the food, he eats and if he doesn’t then he does not eat and does not comment.
Before declaring her to be in error, try other indirect approaches that are more subtle than direct accusations
Escape from using insults and words that may hurt her feelings.
When it becomes necessary to discuss a problem wait until you have privacy from others.
Waiting until the anger has subsided a bit can help to keep a control on your words.

Finally, please make Du’a for the writer; Sheikh Mohammad Abdelhaleem Hamed, for the translator brother Abu Talhah and for reviewer Br. Adam Qurashi. Remember this is not a perfect translation so forgive us our faults and correct our errors. Muslim Students’ Association University of Alberta Edmonton, Canada February, 1999.

Taken from : Newsletter

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Shaheed zinda Hein

November 24, 2012 By: Mohammad Rafique Etsame Category: Current Islamic Articles

شہید زندہ ہیں
محمدرفیق اعتصامی
ارشاد باری تعالیٰ ہے جو لوگ خدا کی راہ میں مارے جائیں انھیں مردہ مت کہو بلکہ وہ زندہ ہیں اپنے رب کے پاس اور انھیں رزق دیا جاتا ہے ۔ یہ آیت کریمہ شہیدوں کے مرتبہ و مقام پر روشنی ڈالتی ہے کہ جو لوگ اللہ تبارک و تعالیٰ کی راہ میں لڑتے لڑتے شہید ہو جاتے ہیں وہ امر ہو جاتے ہیں اور انھیں حیات ابدی عطا ہوتی ہے اور انھیں اپنے رب کے ہاں رزق دیا جاتا ہے۔ تفسیر میں لکھا ہے کہ شہیدوں کی ارواح کو سبز پرندوں کی صورت عطا کی جاتی ہے اور وہ جنت کی سیر کرتی ہیں اور اسکی نعمتوں سے لطف اندوز ہوتی رہتی ہیں۔
اس پس منظر میں جب ہم شہادت امام حسین علیہ السلام کا جائزہ لیتے ہیں تو یہ بات عیاں ہوتی ہے کہ یزید کے خلاف لشکر کشی سے انکا مقصد دنیاوی تاج و تخت کا حصول نہ تھا بلکہ وہ خالص اللہ تبارک و تعالیٰ کی رضا اوراسلام کی سربلندی کیلئے لڑے اور اپنی اور اپنے اہل خانہ کی جانوں کا نذرانہ خدا کے حضور پیش کیا۔ اگرچہ انکی شہادت کا غم بہت زیادہ ہے اور ہر مسلمان کی آنکھ اس سے اشکبار ہے مگر اسلامی تعلیمات کے مطابق ایسے موقعوں پر صبر و تحمل کا مظاہرہ کرنا چاہئے اور انکے لئے ایصال ثواب اور دعا کرنی چاہئے اس لئے کہ زندوں کا ماتم نہیں کیا جاتابلکہ ان کے وسیلہ سے اپنے لئے دعا کی جاتی ہئے کہ باری تعالیٰ! ہمیں بھی انکے نقش قدم پر چلنے کی توفیق عطا فرما اور ہمیں دنیا و آخرت میں کامیابی و کامرانی نصیب فرما اور ہماری بخشش فرما دے آمین ۔
شرعی دستور العمل یہ ہے کہ ہر مسلمان کو ہفتہ میں ایک بار ضرور قبرستان جانا چاہئے اور اپنے عزیز و اقرباء جو فوت ہوچکے ہیں انکے لئے دعا کرنی چاہئے اور قبرستان داخل ہوتے وقت یہ دعا پڑھنی چا ہئے السلام علیکم دار قوم مومنین وانا ان شا ء اللہ بکم لاحقون کہ تم پر سلامتی ہواے مو منین قبر والو ہم بھی انشاء اللہ تمہا رے ساتھ ملنے والے ہیں اسکے لئے بہترین دن جمعہ کا دن ہے اگر اس دن نہ جا سکے تو جمعرات او ر ہفتہ کے روز بھی جایا جا سکتا ہے۔ مگر عام طور پرہوتا یہ ہے کہ لوگ دس محرم الحرام کو ہی قبرستان جاتے ہیں اور خواتین بھی ہمراہ ہوتی ہیں جس سے بے پردگی ہوتی ہے اور جاتے وقت پھول اور کھجور کی تر شاخیں بھی ساتھ لے جاتے ہیں کہ عقیدہ یہ ہے شاخ جب تک تر رہتی ہے اللہ کاذکر کرتی رہتی ہے یہ صحیح ہے مگر اسطرح دس محرم الحرام کو قبروں پر پھول اور شاخیں ڈالنا حدیث شریف سے ثابت نہیں بلکہ واقعہ یوں ہے کہ ایک بار نبی پاک ﷺ ایک قبرستان سے گذر رہے تھے آپ نے فرمایا کہ ان دو قبروالوں پر عذاب ہو رہا ہے وجہ یہ ہے کہ یہ شخص پیشاب کے چھینٹوں سے بچتا نہیں تھا اور یہ شخص چغلخوری کرتا تھا پھر آپ ﷺ نے کھجورکی شاخ لانے کا حکم دیا اوراسکے دو ٹکڑے کرکے اسے دونوں قبروں پر ڈال دیا اور فرمایا امید ہے اللہ تبارک و تعالیٰ اسکی وجہ سے انکے عذاب میں کمی کر دے۔
نبی پاک ﷺ کو توبذریعہ وحی یہ معلوم ہو گیا تھا کہ ان قبر والوں کو عذاب ہو رہا ہے مگر ہم خود ہی یہ فرض کر لیتے ہیں کہ انھیں عذاب ہو رہا ہے تاہم اگر برکت کیلئے بھی یہ چھڑیاں ڈالی جائیں تو اسکا تقاضا یہ ہے کہ جب بھی یہ چھڑیاں خشک ہو جائیں تو فوراً نئی چھڑیاں انکی جگہ ڈال دینی چاہئیں اور یہ سلسلہ تمام سال جاری رہنا چاہئے نہ کہ صرف دس محرم الحرام کو ہی !!!
اللہ تبارک و تعالیٰ مجھے اور آپ کو سنت نبوی ﷺ پر چلنے کی توفیق عطا فرمائے خاتمہ ایمان پر فرمائے آمین۔

Some bright aspects of Islamic Society

November 09, 2012 By: Mohammad Rafique Etsame Category: Uncategorized